Adoption Is The New Pregnant

Or at least it is for us.  We are pregnant with hope and dreams of the little girl that will join our family some time in the next couple of years.  Maybe not in the traditional sense but pregnant all the same. Kyle and I have always known we would like to adopt some day. Adoption. Nearly two years ago our hearts were stirred, well mine was, to the point of wondering if it was time to start the process.  Then we learned we were pregnant with Azariah and decided that pregnancy hormones and the emotions of such a process were not something we wanted to mix so I put this dream from my mind yet again and focused on the awesome craziness that was our life at the time....but this dream remained closer to the surface of my heart than it had ever been before. So much so that not long after Az was born I told Kyle that I felt it was time to open the door to this journey.  Research began.  I began praying in earnest that God would guide and direct my heart.  That He would align Kyle and I...I couldn't very well start down this road without him. Then we were both praying about what God was calling us to. We were ready. Come what may.

It is all very overwhelming. Which agency do we work with? International it is...but which country? Ethiopia? How much does it cost?! What age are we looking to adopt...baby? older child? Male? Female? A special needs child?  It will take how long for a referral?  Our hearts have been stirred and the process has begun... a very long process.  There are moments when this wait seems unbearably long and yet we are content with where we are at, knowing that God has a plan bigger than our own. 

I recall sitting at my computer looking at pictures of children who are waiting for homes.  Kylee approached from behind and asked who the kids were.  I shared with her that the children we were looking at lived in a place called an orphanage and that orphanages were for children who didn't have Mamas or Daddies to take care of them.  Her eyes shone with compassion and she turned to me and said, "They can come live with us Mommy.  You and Daddy can be there Mommy and Daddy." My heart soared at her response.  

God has turned our hearts toward Ethiopia.  The beautiful country that it is with the rich culture and heritage has taken root in my heart.  My heart breaks for the millions of children who are orphans.  For the millions who are living on the streets with no adult to care for them or love them. Passages like James 1:27 Pure and genuine religion in the sight of God the Father means caring for orphans and widows in their distress and refusing to the led the world corrupt you  have become so incredibly real for us. Our eyes have been opened. Our hearts are forever changed and this my friends is just the beginning for us.

When you get pregnant you don't get to pick...you don't go through the drive through and order a perfectly healthy girl with a side of no issues. To choose a child, well this part of the process was very difficult.  To know baby girls are more likely to be adopted than baby boys, many don't want to adopt an older child or one who has a misshaped head or a missing limb...what about the child with medical needs that won't get adopted?  How do you say no I am not willing to love that child? I still don't have the answer to that.  When we began researching Adoption agencies and programs it was all so overwhelming but in time we began to see a clearer picture of the road we are taking.  Our little girl will come from Ethiopia.  She may not even be born yet and we love her all the same.  Much like that moment you begin dreaming of getting pregnant or when you find out that you are.  Something takes over.  A passion for getting your home and hearts ready for a new little person to fill up the spaces that seem to be waiting for them.
There are days (with many ahead) where the longing and heartache I feel are so heavy.  In Matthew 11:28 its says 'Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest.' The truth is, heartache is what happens when you open your eyes to the realities that others are facing. Millions of others.  Millions.   I believe that God will meet us where we are at.
We will spend our time waiting for her to come home praying for her and her family, learning about Ethiopia and preparing our home for the much awaited day when we carry her across the threshold to her Forever Family.
Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him 
Psalm 37:5
Isn't it exciting?!